Until I found my life again, I drown. So save me now.

This is our last goodbye

Must I dream and always see your face?

I knew you'd be there. Every cell in my brain was screaming "Don't go! Don't go!" yet I did and tortured myself with atrial fibrillation once again. You didn't change one bit. You were the same puny boy who swallowed me whole over two years ago. Gah. The moment I laid my eyes on you, I wanted to come crashing through the glass windows and plunge through the darkness of the night and be forgotten altogether. It pained me knowing I was standing there right in front of you and I wasn't worth at least a hi from you.

I had a million questions to ask... answers to which I know I'd never have. That will forever tag you as my proverbial one that got away. And much as I deny it, I know I could never be as in love as I was with you (or the person you were with me). For that reason alone, I could hate you and I do and I wish I could erase you forever from my past because you screwed me up so bad, I couldn't force myself to trust my heart anymore.

Two years... no formal goodbyes, no explanations, no closure, no bandages for the wounds. It's easier to say I didn't know you at all and what we had was faker than plastic trees. I didn't know you at all and you know why. There's never gonna be a moment of truth for you. Go on living in your lies.

I'll go on searching for my truths.

posted by Ketch Pablo @ 12:49 PM