Monday, March 27, 2006

You Me Her Him

I can't believe I gave two complete strangers the address to my mind. The cold winds must have caused me brain freeze. Toink.

Reading my previous post sends shivers down my spine. She almost won me over. Good thing I had half the mind not to act impulsively nor stupidly again. Gotta give her kudos. She's one heck of a manipulative genius. Her words are pegs of a picket white fence that would've kept you out of my well-tended garden. Good thing a tornado came along and blew each one away.

It doesn't change the fact that I'm carefully prying your delicate little fingers open from your clasp of my hand, though. Slow death. Slowly and surely. So slowly you wouldn't even notice It die.

I'd still be on your side... But on a professional note. We've a vocation and we cannot turn our backs on each other no matter how our selves want to. THAT is what sets us apart. THAT is what makes us who we are. IF you haven't realized that yet, then I must've missed something.

I can't help but wonder what it is that makes you miss me. You say it too much now that when you say it, I look forward to what follows the dot-dot-dot that punctuates it. You say it too much that its meaning has turned into a dull shade of grey. You say it too much that I have to take a second look at the sender to confirm it's you... and not him.

It pisses me off that you are turning out to be everything I've tried hard to overlook about him when we were together... And everything that I took into consideration to help me stay away now that we are not. But, I feel different. How I wish I felt the same as I did with him.

How I wish I understand why despite my neurotic attacks that you trigger, I feel like I am the best of me now with you... that I never want to leave unless you ask me to. Were we sent down the same path so I can show you and be your light? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe I already did, and my purpose has been served... And the curtain has fallen for one of the roles I play.


At 10:22 AM, Blogger alphafemme said...

hi floi!

sad, sad, sad blog you have here...

At 11:28 AM, Blogger said...

Hey Iya... I knooowww! This isn't me. I've been possessed by some lovesick monster. Exorcising! =)

At 1:56 AM, Blogger alphafemme said...

yang love love yan. wag na yan! matagl pa valentine's haha. joke. :)


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