Sunday, May 22, 2016

That One Thing

Hi babe,

I promised myself that I shall not contact you anymore after the email I sent yesterday and I remembered that I have this blog so here I am... Back to where I was before I decided to move forward with you.

Hmmm...

It just bugs me what your dear mother told me. She quoted you. I immediately deleted the message so I wouldn't overanalyze it and overreact to it but if I remember right, it was something along the lines of "When we got back together, you accepted that it would be a difficult life with me but you would never leave me unless I make you leave." She added her personal note of not blaming anyone but I made a choice, I did what I did, and now I have to live with it. She just wants me to move on which quite frankly, felt more like "just leave my son alone. I need him to find someone else." SHE DOESN'T KNOW LOVE SO SHE COULDN'T TEACH YOU LOVE.

This is the problem. I can come up with ten thousand reasons why we should stay together but all that doesn't matter because of one reason why we should break up and that is the mistake I made that you didn't help me avoid. No one else knows how we feel when we are in each other arms, babe. No one else knows how fucking awesome our lovemaking is. No one else knows how much fun we have even just doing the most mundane of things like sitting on the couch. No one else knows how much we make each other laugh.

You asked for one thing and I couldn't give it. Well, I did give you so much laughter and tips on how to feel better about yourself and I did give you the best blowjob, didn't I? No? Then, by all means, please do move on and never look back. I have been fighting for us for five years. When was the last time you fought for us? Was I the one who threw everything away? One thing, Olex. One thing. I was hormonal and emotional and needy and made a mistake and there is no forgiveness for it.

To be honest, with how you treated me the past two months, I believe we are even at making each other feel like shit. Congratulations. Your revenge was a success. Now, live with YOUR decision. I'll take my love somewhere else.

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